If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow.

Phelps’s quip uses comic exaggeration to challenge a shallow definition of happiness as mere comfort and the absence of worry. By proposing the “American cow” as the logical winner under that definition—an animal stereotypically well-fed, sheltered, and unburdened by human anxieties—he implies that human happiness must involve more than physical ease. The remark points toward a more “human” account of well-being: purpose, aspiration, moral choice, intellectual or spiritual engagement, and even the meaningful struggle that accompanies them. The humor sharpens the critique, making the philosophical point memorable while also satirizing a culture tempted to equate prosperity and convenience with the good life.