My vigor, vitality and cheek repel me – I am the kind of woman I would run from.

In this self-lacerating epigram, Astor turns her public reputation—forceful, energetic, outspoken (“cheek”)—into the object of satire. The line reads as a paradox: the very qualities that enable her to act decisively and command attention also make her feel abrasive, even alien to herself. By saying she is “the kind of woman I would run from,” she exposes how social expectations can be internalized, so that a woman’s assertiveness is judged (even by the woman herself) as something unfeminine or threatening. The wit functions as both confession and critique: it acknowledges personal discomfort while highlighting the cultural reflex to punish female vigor.