Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Claus. Unfortunately, so did my parents. So I never got anything.

The joke hinges on a reversal of the usual childhood disappointment about Santa: instead of learning Santa isn’t real, the speaker claims the real problem was that everyone—including the parents—believed in Santa, so they outsourced responsibility for gifts to a figure who never arrived. The line satirizes how adults use myths and rituals to manage children’s expectations, and it exaggerates that dynamic into absurdity. Beneath the punchline is a darker implication about neglect or poverty reframed as comedy: the narrator’s “never got anything” becomes both a literal gag and a commentary on how stories can mask uncomfortable family realities.