Little children, headache; big children, heartache.

This saying is circulated as an Italian proverb in English-language collections of folk wisdom. It reflects a common, cross-cultural parental observation: when children are very young, the burdens they bring are largely physical and practical (noise, illness, sleepless nights), while as they grow older the anxieties shift toward emotional and moral concerns (choices, relationships, safety, disappointment). Like many proverbs, it likely arose from domestic experience rather than a single identifiable author or moment, and it is typically used conversationally—often by parents or grandparents—to summarize the changing nature of caregiving over a child’s life.

The proverb contrasts two kinds of parental strain. “Headache” stands for the immediate, manageable troubles of early childhood—tantrums, constant supervision, and everyday ailments. “Heartache” points to the deeper, less controllable pain that can accompany a child’s growing independence: worry over their decisions, suffering, or distance from the family. The line implies that parenting does not become easier with age; it changes in character from bodily fatigue to emotional vulnerability. Its compact parallelism (“little/big,” “headache/heartache”) gives it the force of a warning and a consolation: later worries are normal, even if they feel heavier.

1) “Small children, small problems; big children, big problems.”
2) “Little children, little worries; big children, big worries.”
3) “Little children, little sorrows; big children, big sorrows.”