Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

This saying is widely circulated in modern English as a Buddhist-leaning proverb and is frequently attributed in popular culture to the Buddha, though it is commonly presented as “Anonymous” in quotation collections because a verifiable canonical source is elusive. It appears in late-20th-century self-help, mindfulness, and anger-management contexts, where it functions as a vivid teaching story: the person who nurtures anger in order to harm another ends up suffering first. The metaphor aligns with common themes in Buddhist ethics about the self-harming effects of hatred and the practical value of letting go, but the exact wording is best treated as a contemporary paraphrase rather than a traceable ancient text.

The image of gripping a hot coal captures how anger is immediately injurious to the one who holds it. Even if anger is justified or aimed at someone who has caused harm, sustaining it requires ongoing mental and physiological arousal—rumination, tension, and a narrowed focus—that “burns” the angry person long before it reaches its target. The quote reframes anger from a weapon into a liability: it promises retaliation but delivers self-damage. Its ethical implication is not that wrongdoing should be ignored, but that effective action is clearer and less self-destructive when it is not fueled by clinging to rage.