Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

Delivered as a one-liner in the tradition of mid‑20th‑century American stand-up, the joke pivots from the expected moral advice about not hitting children to a self-interested, physical punchline. “Never raise your hand” initially sounds like a humane injunction against corporal punishment; the second sentence undercuts that expectation by implying the real danger is retaliation—specifically a kick to the groin. The humor depends on surprise and on the incongruity between ethical parenting and self-preservation, while also hinting (however crudely) that violence invites counter-violence and loss of control.