There is no neediness in desire … there is no caretaking in desire. Caretaking is mightily loving, [but] it's a powerful anti-aphrodisiac.

Esther Perel

Quotation #16743

About This Quote


Source: "The Secret to Desire in a Long-Term Relationship." TEDSalon NY2013. Feb. 2013. Conference Presentation. Additional Information: This quote by sex therapist Esther Perel means that sexual desire cannot coexist with neediness and caretaking. In other words, if one partner in a relationship needs the other partner to constantly take care of them, then this will diminish the sexual aspect of the relationship, even if the relationship is loving. The quote is from Perel's 2013 TED Talk about maintaining sexual desire in long-term relationships. Watch the full TED Talk here: Esther Perel - The Secret to Desire in a Long-Term Relationship