We will have to give up the hope that, if we try hard, we somehow will always do right by our children. The connection is imperfect. We will sometimes do wrong.

Viorst is puncturing a common parental fantasy: that sufficient effort, love, and vigilance can guarantee morally and emotionally “right” outcomes for one’s children. She frames parenting as an inherently fallible human relationship—good intentions do not create perfect attunement, and even conscientious parents will misjudge, overreact, neglect, or impose their own needs. The quote’s force lies in its realism and its implied ethical stance: responsibility in parenting includes accepting limits, repairing harm, and tolerating guilt without being paralyzed by it. By relinquishing the hope of perfection, parents can move toward humility, responsiveness, and resilience—qualities more sustainable than constant self-justification or self-blame.